The food mixer that caused more than just a stir

May 16, 2012

Dear Max

I’m not sure how or why it happened, but you hate my Kenwood Chef. There is something about it that freaks you out, makes you cry, and causes you to vomit from anxiety. I can’t explain it. I’ve only started baking regularly recently, and it’s not like you’ve had an accident or other run-in with it (or a flopped cake).

I know to do my baking when you’re not home, and yesterday you outsmarted me – I simply lined up the baking ingredients and you knew. I hadn’t even touched the Kenwood Chef (now 30 years old, and passed down by your granny) and you hollered and were genuinely upset. Sisi managed to distract you, you fell asleep from exhaustion, and I baked some kick-ass chocolate chip-peanut butter biscuits.

When I got home last night, you refused to come back to the house, happy in Sisi’s cottage where you read, played and interacted with your iPad. You did not want to come home, assumedly shit scared about coming back to the house with that machine which shall not be named. Not even the lure of choc chip-peanut butter biscuits could shift you.

Dude, please come home! Come back to your coop soon, to the place where your mother bird waits. She who birthed you (thanks to the help of Pethidine and spinal block), who fed you (not biscuits, I might add) and who wants you back in the nest. I promise not to lay out baking ingredients in front of you. Nor enter you into Masterchef one day.

Love you,


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  • Lauren

    Awesome Blog!!!

    May 16, 2012 at 9:50 am Reply
  • Lea-Anne

    LOL poor dude! My 3 year old daughter is also poop scared of my russel hobbs mixer if its any consolation, we bake with her asleep or at my mom’s place but recently for a little bit she has been ok with it… so lets hope its something they outgrow! xx

    May 16, 2012 at 9:53 am Reply
  • Cat@jugglingactoflife

    It’ s a sound overload thing. The princess could not,stand daddy’s drill and L hates the lawn,ower. So much so thatnhe has nightmares about it. And no, I have no,clever advice

    May 16, 2012 at 1:32 pm Reply
  • Nikki Heyman

    It might be the sudden noise that it makes. Put a towel over it to dampen the noise and let him turn it on and off. That way he can anticipate when its coming and he won’t get such a fright.

    May 16, 2012 at 10:12 pm Reply
    • Tanya Kovarsky

      Hmmm, will try that. Thank you! 🙂

      May 17, 2012 at 10:16 am Reply
  • Kirsty

    Ah, shame lil guy! I did have a giggle at this, though. Love this blog!

    May 17, 2012 at 8:31 am Reply
    • Tanya Kovarsky

      Thank you so much 🙂

      May 17, 2012 at 10:15 am Reply
  • Pamela

    Mine has taken an intense dislike to the vacumn cleaner….

    I have promised not to use it while she is in the house. The things I have to sacrifice doing in the name of good parenting.

    May 24, 2012 at 4:11 pm Reply
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